


another love

by pulisics



Category: Football RPF
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Getting Together, Light Angst, M/M, Pining, Real Madrid CF, Songfic, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-20
Updated: 2016-11-20
Packaged: 2018-09-01 03:29:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 968
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8605498
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pulisics/pseuds/pulisics
Summary: i wanna cry and i wanna love, but all my tears have been used up inspired by tom odell's another love





	

There was a time when he used to laugh, cry and get excited all the time. He would get excited when he saw puppies, when it rained, when his favourite song came on and when his team won the derby, but that was all in the past now. Lucas couldn't remember the last time he saw him get that excited. He started ignoring the puppies, hating the rain, stopped watching football games – yes, even the Real Madrid ones – and when his favourite song came on, it was nothing but an excuse for him to drink more. 

It was sad, watching a person you know fall apart in front of you. The young Spaniard missed the way his friend used to be. The way his blue eyes sparkled and lips stretched into a beautiful shy smile, while he moved his hands quickly trying to make up for the lack of Spanish wording he needed. Lucas missed how worked up he would get over teasing, how mad he would get when somebody messed with his silky blond hair and the way his cheeks turned pink whenever somebody complimented him, which happened a lot because the German was really smart. 

Toni was cold now. None of those things bothered him anymore and Lucas couldn't remember the last time he saw anything but a stone cold expression on his face.

 

The other boy didn't like it either. He was scared of how easy it was for him to simply turn his emotions off whenever he wanted to. After getting so used to it, he forgot to turn them back on, he forgot to remind himself to feel again. 

It wasn't his fault, really. He wanted to laugh at pointless stuff and get excited over the smallest things. He wanted to show any kind of emotion, even if it involved him crying himself to sleep. He wanted to cry and to love, but all of his tears were used up on a person that he barely talked to anymore. 

After spending six months on crying over Isco, he was completely empty of tears. He became so immune to it all that he couldn't cry anymore. Instead, he would now lay in self pity and stare at the ceiling. 

He wanted to feel anger, too. But it wasn't Alvaro's fault that he came back to their uni, that he was and would always be Francisco's first love. Toni understood that, but it didn't make it hurt any less. 

 

Lucas was trying, he really was. It started with small things, like bringing Toni coffee in the mornings before their 8:00 lessons, or leaving small notes for him to brighten up his day. The younger boy hoped, prayed, for a reaction. It didn't matter if Toni smiled at him or shouted at him, he just wanted something. But the German would simply take his coffee with the smallest nod of his head and leave .   
Toni was Lucas' friend and it made Lucas want to help him even more. He tried to talk to Toni and visit him more often. He would bring sweets and silly movies and hope to anything holy that it helped.  
Lucas used baby steps, knowing how hurt the other man was. It took him a month until he got the first reaction. 

It was raining and Lucas was standing at Toni's doorstep soaking wet, with a pizza box in his hands. He could swear he saw a hint of worry on the other man's face, but it was gone as soon as it appeared. His gaze was shifted to the floor, until he heard the beautiful, croaked voice. 

"You don't have to do this, you know." Lucas' eyes shoot up to meet the pair of familiar blue eyes and he smiled. 

"I know, but I want to." 

Toni just opened the door wider and went to get him some towels. He fell asleep in Toni's oversized hoodie, on Toni's couch, and he has never felt more comfortable. 

 

After some time, it became their little routine. Lucas would come to Toni's apartment with food, they would chat – which Lucas saw as a huge progress – and the younger one would spend the night there. Slowly but surely Toni started opening up more, talking about everything with Lucas and even watching football matches together. Lucas was relieved to find out the other man also loved Real Madrid.   
They also became closer.   
It was baby steps again, but soon enough Lucas was crashing in Toni's bed, instead of his couch. "It was more comfortable that way." Toni said once. 

Lucas' words were kind, but they didn't give him the same feelings as his did. 

Lucas was beautiful, he really was. He had dark hair, just like him. 

His smile was also beautiful, it could light up the whole room and make ice melt, but it just wasn't like his. 

Toni assumed that his eyes were pretty, too. If he could feel again, he'd probably feel bad for not remembering the Spaniard's eye colour , but he was too tired to notice it. And when he wanted to, Lucas' eyes were closed, as he slept in his bed peacefully, looking like an angel. If Toni didn't know better, he'd probably think that Lucas indeed was an angel. He helped him get better and made him happy again, well... almost. 

Lucas was amazing, perfect almost, but not for Toni. Maybe he would be perfect for Toni one day, one day when his heart healed completely. Because as much as he wanted to love Lucas, nobody deserved a broken person and only half of their heart. 

Toni sighed and laid on his side of the bed, turning his back towards the younger man, not knowing that at the same moment the other one opened his eyes. They were brown.


End file.
